Fat-fighting Frodo biscuits!

April 6th, 2011 § 2 comments

Whether prompted by the recession or to fit snugly between little fingers, Bakers have produced a range of mini biscuits. And they are incredibly cute. Have you ever seen the mini Marie, the mini Eet-Sum-Mor, the mini Tennis (my personal favourite) and the mini Romany Creams Balls? I love the simplicity of Tennis biscuits and first bought a packet of mini Ts when I attempted a detox diet in January… yes, let that sink in nicely before you continue.

Gandalf (top), with Frodo, Pippin, Merry and Sam

The thinking was that when I simply had to cheat, I could have four mini Ts whilst actually having the equivalent of just one biscuit. In fact, four mini Ts don’t even make one whole big T, see exhibit A below.

Thumbnail-sized treats

I got the detox diet from a well-known ladies mag… which I generally as a rule never ever buy because they make me feel fat, ugly and on a collision course with dread disease (whichever one’s the flavour of the month). Yet, after a three week road trip fueled by Karoo lamb and litres of wine, a more fascist approach was called for.

The article contained pearls such as: No starving – promise! and One vital rule to follow on this eating plan is to avoid snacking between meals… So what happened to the six-mini-meals-a-day school of thought? The one I graduated from, huh? But I think what spelled my doom before I’d even downed my first cup of hot water with lime and sliced ginger… was the bizarre nut allocation throughout the diet.

Day 1, breakfast: Amongst other things, 2 almonds. TWO ALMONDS.

Day 2, breakfast: Blah blah and ONE BRAZIL NUT. WTF? One nut. What must I do with the rest of the packet? Even better, what must I do with one nut. Can’t I just have 4 almonds??? What if you don’t have people around to scoff the rest? How are you supposed to maintain your detoxed derriere with all the nuts in the house from day 6 onwards and for the rest of your life? Have you magazine people given this proper thought?

Day 3… TWO WHOLE WALNUTS. Aha, I thought… now I get it. You buy a bag of mixed nuts and carefully select your daily nut/s. But what cruel temptation…. when is it cashew day? And we all know it will never be macadamia nut day on a diet so when will it be OK to eat all the NICE NUTS… The one’s that taste good with beer.

Just thinking about this diet drove me nuts, hence the Bakers four-for-one biscuit solution to snacking. But a few good things came of my half-baked attempt at detox:

1. I made a cabbage/tomato/carrot soup which I snacked on between real snacks and meals. It lasts for up to four weeks in the fridge but if you push it to eight, you can weave placemats with it.

2. I jotted down everything that I consumed for two days and the results were so shocking I stopped. I stopped jotting them down, I mean…

Day 1: One banana, 2 slices rye toast with jam, 2 cappuccinos, sachet of bbq chicken fillets on the run, salad with rocket, feta, tomatoe and blueberries, “1” Tennis biscuit (4 minis), 1 chomp (another golden oldie, tastes like brown crayon but I love it), bowl of detox cabbage soup, 2 provita with cottage cheese, another two provita with cottage cheese, and 2 glasses of wine and regretfully, I have to admit… 9 cigarettes.

Day 2: Was much worse but you get the picture. The more you think about it the more you eat.

Except the mini Bakers really work. They somehow hit the spot and you really won’t have 12 in one go. I betcha. Plus I get to post a ridiculous header, devoid of truth, designed to prey on your fear-of-fat-rear, promising unlikely weight-loss – much like all the wimmins magazines out there…

BUT this got me thinking… So, yes, it’s COMPETITION TIME!

Remember the triangular cheesecake I wrote about not too long ago? It’s made with three rows of Tennis biscuits, folded in a triangular shape and frozen. Like so:

Expo Kaaskoek aka Boere Casata

The first person to send a pic of a triangular cheesecake made with mini Tennis biscuits (just three rows, so it’s a proper miniature version of this recipe) wins a case of Noble Savage red wine. Delivery’s on me! Other mini versions of classic desserts made with these biscuits are most welcome too!

Less is morish!

And no, the people at Bakers have nothing to do with this. I just think they’re cool.

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